When You're here I'll never be lonley.

- November 01, 2012

"So hold me. When You're here ill never be lonely. You're my favorite part of this story. So, sing it again and again.."

I woke up with those song lyrics in my head Tuesday morning during Case's inpatient stay at Children's. Case had his tethered cord release surgery on Monday and is doing great! We stayed at Children's until yesterday. I'm stayed in his room with him and had a peaceful stay. The hardest part was when Case reached his hands up and from laying flat in his hospital crib and said, "wanna ge owwwww" (want to get out). He had to lay flat for 48 hours. He's amazing and special for a very apparent reason. Hospital stays, needles, doctors and medications have become a part of his life so much that it's his norm and he walks down the halls like he owns the place. I've felt a particular amount of joy and peace this time around. I belong too. Being a special mom is who I am and runs deep in my blood. I talk in medical terms, fight for a single room and stop the beeping machines like a pro. I've seen so many familiar faces and made new friends. I ran into the geneticist and GI doctor just in passing and they booth stopped to talk about the special boy. It's apparent that God has written a different story for this family and He is my favorite part. When I laid on the padded bench in a cold hospital room with my "medically complex" kiddo just feet away hooked to tubes and IVs I felt a very apparent calmness, like god had His hands wrapped right around my heart and wouldn't let any of the sadness, fear and frustration that usually comes with a surgery and hospital stays go in there. I've read many stories and poems about special needs parents and agree with most of the words but my favorite part in those stories is when ordinary people become extraordinary because God has given them something that is often considered by the outside world as unsatisfactory. Dan and I were given a very special gift that has opened our eyes to a very blessed world. Even our girls understand that different isn't defective, different is beautiful and God knew that this family could handle a very special kind of beautiful.;)