Saturday, September 15, 2012

Flash Back!

Today is Neonatal Nurses day. As I'm thinking of how to thank one of my favorites that I'm still in touch with my mind zooms back to December 23rd, 2010. This was the day I was discharged from Magee (where I delivered Case via c-section) and moved into my new home, the Ronald McDonald House in Pittsburgh. Dan walked me through the bright colored wall of CHP and back to my tiny man's new home. There he lay, in his box under the billy lights with a visor on his face. His tiny 2 pound 13 ounce body had holes and bruises from what seemed like constant poking and pricking. I could not hold him. His food was TPN via an IV. I was completely exhausted from, you know being cut open just days before. I didn't use a wheel chair or fill my prescription of Percocet. Once in the room I realized this was going to be a long, hard road with lots of tears and triumphs. My baby belonged to the NICU. They decided when he was held, fed and poked. That first day I was mostly alone while Dan got Christmas and the kids from our home and moved it and them into the Ronald McDonald House. As the evening rolled in I was dizzy from emotional and physical exhaustion. It was then I met one of my very favorite NICU nurses, Kristy. It was 7pm. The day nurse was giving her report and it wasn't pretty, full of all the things "wrong" with my precious baby. As I listened, my face got hot and I had no control over the the tears that filled my eyes. I tried to escape but the closest bathroom seemed miles away. There she was, my NICU angel, Kristy telling me it's okay to cry. I bawled. It was an uncontrollable, ugly cry right in front of her. I was in over my head with no way out. As the days went on, I got stronger, smarter and eventually felt like Case belonged to me not the NICU. Every step of the way there was a constant comfort in nursing scrubs. You see, the doctors came and went but it was the NICU nurses that were there for the good, the bad and the ugly. They weren't just nurses. They were nurses, doctors, therapists, baby holders, baby feeders, artists, comforters, bathers and most importantly, friends. Friends that I will NEVER forget! Here's to the heroes of the NICU in nursing scrubs! You will always have a place in my heart and I will be drinking a glass of wine I your honor.;) You mean more than you'll ever know...

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