Guys! I used to be terrible at this....
Guys....I used to be TERRIBLE at this. Now, I’m just not great at it. Living in the moment. It sounds easy enough but really, it takes conscious effort to enjoy the good life gives you while NOT dreading what feels like the inevitable. Whether it’s another hospital admission, a decline in my son’s health or a new, scary diagnosis. It’s a mix of fear and anxiety. It’s total lack of control. It’s a lot of things but what living in fear of the future really is, is giving into the thief of living joyfully in the moment. Whether the fear is loud and noticeable or a consistent white nose playing in your brain, it’s toxic. Honestly, it took me years to even realize this is what I was doing. I knew I was worried all of the time. When my phone would buzz with a text form whoever was caring for my son or Case felt even slightly hot I started planning a hospital stay in my brain. I’ve planned hundreds of these that never even happened. This isn’t something I’m proud or even like talking about. It...